A Taste of Lemons

The 24 Hours of Lemons race series is, according to some guy named Jay, the fastest growing form of motorsport in the United States. While I can neither confirm nor deny its empirical growth, I can tell you that it is perhaps the best motor racing value in the country. Endurance races featuring $500.00 cars, thematic team liveries and costumes, and a judging system to keep things safe and sportsmanlike on the track all add up to a weekend of fun racing with other people just as crazy as you. The nature of the cars and the reasonable entry fees keep costs more realistic, and attract a broader audience. To quote the 24 Hours of Lemons website, "It's not just for rich idiots. It's for all idiots."

Speedy Monzales

To say there is a fair amount of theater involved would be fair, but it is also serious racing. Safety is the top priority, because a serious accident would be a serious buzz kill. Winning is, of course, one objective, but most teams participate just for the fun of it. After all, the prize for winning is only $1500.00, not enough to cover the cost of participating in the first place. And it is paid in nickels.

Authority Figure. No, seriously.

I headed out to Eagles Canyon Raceway in Decatur, TX, for the North Dallas Hooptie 2013 to see what the hoopla is all about. I arrived intending to catch up with a few buddies of mine who are involved in putting these races together and to take a few pictures. I ended up sitting in with the judges, assisting them in doling out the penalties. I witnessed two teams perform robot dances in robot costumes, one driver was cling-wrapped to the top of his team's car, and another team wrote their atonement fifty times in Sharpie, on the sheet metal of their car.

"I'm sorry. I will not speed in the pits."

At the end of the day, your car is more likely to be propped up than are your feet, and the beer and oil flow equally throughout the pits. Next time I think I'll try to get behind the wheel.